For as long as I can remember, I’ve spent New Year’s Eve alone. I’ve always preferred it that way. Instead of celebrating with friends and family, I withdraw to my room and spend a quiet evening reflecting on my year — on the highs and lows, on the goals accomplished and abandoned, on how much I’ve grown, how much I’ve learned, and how much I’ve lived. It’s my favorite time to count my blessings, measure my growth, and consider my goals for the new year.
And what a year it’s been…
Exactly one year ago, I spent New Year’s Eve in a hotel room in Phoenix, Arizona, on my way to San Diego. In that room, I decided that 2025 was going to be the best year of my life. It would be better than when I walked across the country, better than when I became a fire lookout, better than anything that had come before. The reason 2025 would be so good was that I knew what my goals were, and I actually had a plan. Fast forward one year, and 2025 has indeed been the best year of my life. It’s been a year of transformation for me, inside and out. I fixed my diet and lost forty pounds. I healed old traumas, faced old fears, and let my guard down. I allowed myself to become vulnerable, to experience heartbreak, and to replace sarcasm with sincerity. And I finally learned what true surrender is. Looking back from this final day of the year, I know that I have changed radically for the better. This year has been the culmination of everything I’ve been learning over the last six years, and all it took was showing up one day at a time.
Growing up, I always wanted change to be immediate. I wanted breakthroughs, quantum leaps, moments that would transform everything in an instant. It was only while walking across the country that I realized that change is never instant. Real change is slow. Real change is deliberate. Real change comes not from big leaps, but from small, consistent steps forward each and every day. So that’s what I did this past year. I decided that each day I would take as many steps forward as I could. Some days I made lots of progress. Some days I barely made any at all. But what mattered was that each day I showed up, regardless of how I felt and regardless of what happened the day before. And little by little, almost imperceptibly, all of those conscious choices added up. Each decision built on the last and made this year so transformational. All it took was consistency and taking each day as it came.
So looking back, I can confidently say that 2025 was the best year of my life. And looking forward, I can say that 2026 will be even better. It won’t be all sunshine and roses. Hardships will arise. The going will get tough. But as long as I take it one day at a time, as long as I make small efforts day by day, progress will be inevitable, and I’ll look back at the end of 2026 feeling just as I do now.
Favorite Moments of the Year
This past year consisted of many small moments, and a few unforgettable ones. These are some of the highlights:
Starting the year right in San Diego…
Paddling 68 miles up the Columbia River
Hiking in Chiricahua National Monument
It was a dramatic season at the fire lookout…
Favorite Books of the Year
By Eckhart Tolle
Rating: 5*/5
At the beginning of this year, someone gave me this book as a gift. To my surprise, it describes exactly what I found on my walk across America. It speaks of letting go of everything and allowing yourself to simply be. Anxiety lives in the future. Regret haunts the past. But in the present moment, there is simply peace. I discovered this while I was walking, but moments of pure presence were fleeting. This book taught me how to exercise presence in my day-to-day life, and kickstarted the transformation I experienced this year.
By Peter Nichols
Rating: 5/5
In 1968, the London Sunday Times sponsored a race to become the first person to sail nonstop around the world, solo. This book follows the nine men who answered the call, and all of the chaos and calm they experienced on their journeys. For some, it was a personal challenge. For others, a spiritual quest. For all, it was an adventure full of storms, waves, crises, and ingenuity. It was an exhilarating read. And for me, the greatest satisfaction came not from the winner of the race, but from the man who found what he had been searching for.
By Norman Maclean
Rating: 5/5
I picked up this book, not really knowing what to expect. I certainly wasn’t expecting to love it as much as I did. It has my favorite prose of any book I’ve read this year, with the narrative flowing seamlessly throughout Norman Maclean’s history and thoughts about his life. Coupled with USFS 1919, a brief but hilarious story about a summer spent working in the mountains as a packer, firefighter, and lookout, this was one of my favorite books of the year.
Ratings: [5* - All Time Favorite] [5 - Will read again in 10 years] [4 - Will read again in 20 years] [3 - Good story or prose, but won’t read again] [2 - Has a redeeming quality, but not good overall] [1 - Irredeemable]
By Cheryl Strayed
Rating: 5/5
Another adventure book, Wild tells the story of a woman who lost her way, and found it again while hiking on the Pacific Crest Trail. I was initially hesitant to pick up this book. The little I knew about Cheryl Strayed’s journey was that she was completely unprepared for it, and had no idea what she was doing. But what I found was the unflinching honesty Cheryl used to examine her life, the grit she had, and the peace she found on her journey. She just gets it, and it was a wonderful read. If you’ve ever considered walking long distances, Wild is a great peek into what you might discover along the way.
By Robert Macfarlane
Rating: 5/5
I had no clue what this book was about when I started reading it, but I’m so glad that I picked it up. This book examines how the Western view of mountains has changed drastically over the last few centuries. The prose is as light and airy as an alpine breeze, as the author ties the evolving views of philosophers and travelers with his own personal anecdotes from the top of the world. This was one of my favorite books that I read at the fire lookout, on top of my own little mountain.
By Ray Bradbury
Rating: 5/5
Over the past few years, I’ve been revisiting books that were required reading in school. This has been my favorite reread so far. Fahrenheit 451 tells the story of a dystopian society that feels uncomfortably familiar to our own. It’s a society where books are burned — not because they’re banned, but because people stopped reading them. It’s a society where immediacy, pleasure, and conformity take priority. It’s a society where you’re always stimulated, but never satiated. And it’s about one man’s awakening and discovery of the things that make life worth living. This novel is prescient and well worth revisiting.
By James Clear
To start the new year, I will be reading Atomic Habits. I keep telling you what I read after the fact, but I figured some of you might enjoy reading along with me sometimes. I’m reading this book because I want to continue honing the habits that helped make 2025 such a good year for me. I’ve included links for all of these books, if you’d like to buy them on Amazon. It helps me out if you do, but no pressure at all. Libraries are free! Support your local bookstores!
Songs I’ve Had on Repeat
My most-played song of the year was Treat You Better by RÜFÜS DU SOL. I heard it for the first time at their concert, and was instantly hooked. The melancholy, the beat, and the hope for the future spoke to my soul and echoed in my ears all year long. Next was Hope (Spiritual Milk Edit) by CamelPhat. This might be one of my favorite songs of all time. It’s aptly named, and fills me with hope and joy when I listen to it (usually directly after Treat You Better). It makes me want to live and dance like nobody’s watching. Soundtrack by the Strike rounds out the Top 3. This song is loaded with 80’s nostalgia, and was the soundtrack of my drives to the beach in San Diego. There are few better songs to listen to with your windows down on a bright summer day.
Farewell, 2025…
Thank you so much for being here and reading this newsletter. I wasn’t sure how these would turn out when I started writing them in January, but I’m happy to say that I’ve thoroughly enjoyed making them. I hope you’ve enjoyed reading them! As always, please let me know what you think. I’m always open to suggestions on what you’d like to see.
Cheers to 2025, the best year of my life! And Cheers to 2026, which will be even better!
Love always,
Ben